Monday, February 28, 2011

Hello on Monday Feb 28, 2011

Hello there,

I have had a great time lately talking to all of my old friends and acquaintances here in Humboldt County.  They have all lent my their ears, their hearts, and their sincere encouragement and support.  I am writing this to thank them (and you) for that- I have given out my blog address to many of you, and so you may be reading this right now as a result.  Thank you.

I would like to invite you to pray for yourselves, pray for your neighbors, and pray for our Father's will to be done.  I'd like you to please pray for Sunny Acres.  Also please pray especially for the children in Honduras, along with Bob and Joyce Coder, and Will Blackwell.  Pray for everyone- those who help us and those who we help............

Anyways, y'all have a nice day.  Just wanted to say thank you...............

God bless,
Craig

Thursday, February 24, 2011

Good morning this Thursday, Feb 24, 2011

Good Morning!

As I woke up I lay there and thought and prayed.  Sometimes I think too much, and all of those thoughts buzzing around create a lot of noise and disturbance.  I remember in years past, and for so long, that I was afraid to quiet my mind because I was afraid of what might fill the void.  I was afraid of God.  I was afraid of what He may ask me to do.  I don't have that fear anymore.  Well, a little at times, but not anything like before.  So now I lay there and wipe my mind clean, and it feels great!  I lay there and say thank you over and over.  I am thankful that God did what He did when He sent His son here.  Jesus chose to go through with the plan and he gave his life for me- and when he did, he cleared the way so that I can go directly to my Father, with no fear, and with no obstacles.  So now I am thankful that this is so, because I realize that what has hurt most all of my life is my unmet needs, and now I fully realize that my greatest need is to just be with my Father, and I am.......................

Craig

Thursday, February 17, 2011

A thankful morning! Thurs, Feb 17, 2011

Good Morning,

I just wanted to write this down to share it with you.  I woke up this morning and lay there in that morning trance- you know, where you are not quite awake and not quite asleep.  I kept saying, "Thank you Papa, Thank you Lord" over and over.  There are things in my past that have hurt.  And there are things in my past that have felt great.  This morning I especially felt my thankfulness for all of those things.  I can see how they have all been for my good- how they have shaped and developed me......and how they have prepared me for my future................

Just wanted to share that with you............

God bless,
Love,
Craig

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Packing!!! Wednesday, Feb 16, 2011

Hello,

I continue to pack!  I have lived in this house for 20 years.  Have I told you the story about this house?  I got divorced in 1991 and started looking for a place to move to.  I wasn't having much luck.  I knew what I wanted, in fact, I visualized what I wanted and prayed for it.  I thought, "I want a safe place.  A place that is big enough for all of my stuff and with a garage to put my boats in.  A cheap place.  A place close by so that I can see my daughter and family often.  How about a quiet place in the country?  And while we're at it, how about a place with a white picket fence around the yard."

One day my dad said, "Hey, why don't you check with the Tunzinis, they have rentals."  So I did.  I drove down a country lane here in Ferndale and found Lucille.  She told me that the people had just moved out and they were cleaning it up.  She went on to tell me all about the house and that it really wasn't much and to not expect much.  Then she stopped talking and looked at me and said, "How did you know it was available?"  I said that I didn't!!!!  I followed her down to the end of the other lane and there was the house.  And guess what?  It was absolutely everything that I had prayed for!!!!  Hallelujah!  God provided just what I needed when I needed it!  I realize now how fortunate I have been to be here- I have been able to be here to help raise my daughter.  I was able to have her about half of every week; I was able to take her to school and pick her up; I was able to help coach her softball teams; I was able to play games with her and cook for her;  I was able to give her a bath, put her in bed, read to her, then say our good night prayers; I was able to take her and her friends Trick-or-treating; I was able to get her playmates to come over to play; I was able to be her father and to experience the greatest blessing in my life.  I was able to stay here and continue working so that I could help pay for her college education at Cal Poly in San Luis Obispo.  She will be graduating in a few months!!  Thank you Father for giving me just what I needed when I needed it.  There were tough and lonely times though.  I have been single all of those years- it helped allow me to be there more fully for my daughter, but it was also painful at times.  Lately I have come to allow myself to just feel my feelings.  I am in recovery myself I realize.  I know that is why I can help out at Sunny Acres.  Suffering means to endure or to carry.  There is meaning in suffering.  We lament our suffering, but how immature and undeveloped we would be without it!  Praise our Loving Father for our suffering.  Thank you Papa...........

So, speaking of feeling my feelings, all of this packing, sorting, saving, throwing away, burning, taking, giving, storing, selling................ is pretty close to overwhelming!  This house is two story with 4 bedrooms, 2 living rooms, and 1 garage!  You know how you expand to fill your space?  I certainly did!  It is a sobering fact to realize that every last little thing we carry into our homes is our responsibility- every last item is something that will need to be dealt with at some point.  I am in a position where I am going to move to one bedroom- so it is not a matter of simply packing up everything and moving it.  It is time for pruning now!  I am ready for it though.  I have been ready to let go of things for a year or two now- I had already started the process of selling things even before I went to Honduras.  God calling!!  So, anyways, this process is emotional and even stressful, as I am leaving my family and friends to start something new.  I would be lying if I denied this.  This process is exactly like getting ready for The Walk.  The preparation was the toughest part- it had it's share of fears and doubts- what I am going through now is the same.  However, God gave me The Walk, and so now I know exactly what to expect and how to do it!!!!  As before, the answer is to trust Him and to keep putting one foot in front of the other.  My preparations are all that I can do- He takes care of the rest.  And I know from The Walk that He does!!!!

Thank you for tuning in.  I hope that you will keep coming back.  I will keep writing from Sunny Acres when I get there.  Sunny Acres is a continuation of The Walk...................


God bless,
Love,
Craig

Friday, February 11, 2011

I'M MOVING TO SUNNY ACRES IN SAN LUIS OBISPO!!! Fri, Feb 11, 2011

Hello all!!

Thank you for tuning in!  I have told you that it was going to get interesting and to stay tuned, so here it is!  I am going to move to Sunny Acres soon!  I didn't want to announce it until I had told my parents about it.  They have been gone for a month on a trip to the southwest.  I felt that it was the respectful thing to do to wait until they got back home before I told them.  They are the most important people in my life and I love them very much.  I told them yesterday and they already had an idea that I may be moving on!  I have never made such a large move on my own before.  I went away to San Jose State University for 3 years after I graduated from high school in 1979- other than that, I have always been here in Humboldt County (except for being born and living in the Los Angeles area for my first 10 years).  If you have been following my blog, this announcement likely does not come as a great surprise.  There is a thread in there that can be followed, isn't there?  I feel that God has been leading me all along.  I felt called to serve more fully and ended up going to Honduras, where I met the Coders and their children.  After I got home from that I felt God tell me on that day when I was walking out in the country, "How about walking from here to San Luis Obispo?"  I could feel that The Walk was to help out the Coders, but also to build my own faith and courage.  The Walk was successful in all three- actually, it was "significant" in all three (have you ever thought about the idea of someone or something being seen as "successful", but what was accomplished really wasn't "significant"?  Think about it).  The Coders have been praying for God's clarity to be given to me, and so it has been!  Thank you Bob, Joyce, Will and the children for praying for me!!  God bless you all!

If you recall from my writing that I had had that still, small voice that spoke to me on the northern coast that said, "I'd like to meet a family and sit and eat and talk with them."  That evening it happened, and that is how I met my friend Erik Poor- who came through for me in a grand way at the end of my walk in SLO.  Later down the coast I had the same voice saying, "I'd like to be taken in by an old rancher."  In my mind, what an "old rancher" is is a straight-shooting, no BS kind of guy who is genuine, real and honest.  I remember as I walked into SLO that I had the thought, "Hmmmm, I didn't meet that old rancher."  As I walked down Los Osos Valley Road on the very last of the home stretch I saw a Christmas tree lot on the left of the highway.  I saw an old barn, a bunch of old farm equipment, a produce stand........and I remember thinking, "This place just looks like the real thing.  It's not pretentious.  It's just what it is."  I took a picture of it.  Down the road a few hundred yards Erik met me and walked me to his home.  As you recall from my writing, days later I mentioned that I was going to stop by that Christmas tree lot to buy my daughter a Christmas tree.  One of Erik's roommates said, "Oh, that's Sunny Acres.  It's run by Dan DeVaul."  Then he told me a little about it.  I became interested and decided that I would like to meet Dan.  I did.  The next day.  He asked me if I would like to volunteer.  I said yes and I did.  After the first week he sat me down and asked if I would be interested in signing on to Sunny Acres permanently!  I told him I'd think and pray about it.  The next morning I told him yes, and stuck around Sunny Acres for about another week.  Then I got cold feet and told him I needed to go back north and see how I felt there.  I thought and prayed about it some more, then several weeks later called him up and confirmed my yes.  I have been packing and sorting all of my stuff since.  I have lived here for 20 years and have a lot of stuff to deal with.  I am finding that, like The Walk, the preparation seems to be more stressful than the walk itself.  I worried before I went on the Walk.  Then what actually happened was that the walking was the best part!  I feel that God gave me The Walk to prepare for this new venture.  I would never have had the courage to do this sort of thing on my own in the past.  All that I have, all that I am, all the courage that I have, all of the faith that I have, is all because of God's mercy, grace, and love that He has shown me.  I cannot take any credit for any of it.  Thank you Father.

So, what is Sunny Acres?  It is a 72 acre ranch that belongs to Dan.  About 9 years ago he started Sunny Acres on his own.  He is a recovering alcoholic and addict himself.  He has literally opened his own home and wallet to help other people in recovery.  There are not many people who put their money where their mouth is like Dan does.  So I am going there to help Dan.  I am going where God has led me.  I see that all of who I am- my skills, talents, gifts, faith.....will be called upon to be put to use in this service.  Boy am I thankful for that!  That in itself was a prayer that I have had for a long time- to serve Him with all that I am.  I can see now that I can't even take any credit for my own prayers.  They were not mine.  I can see now that He gave me my very prayers.  Funny how that works.

Sunny Acres grows tomatoes, pumpkins, squash, and other crops to help support itself.  They split and sell firewood.  Dan believes in recovery through doing useful work.  So do I.  It is not just a clean and sober living facility, but also takes in homeless people or anyone who needs a place when they have none.  It's an incredible place.  I am honored to serve.

I will write more later.  Keep tuning in for "The rest of the story".............................

I would like your prayers.  Thank you.


Sincerely,
God bless,
Craig

Monday, February 7, 2011

Hey y'all !!!!!! Monday, Feb 7, 2011

Hello!

Thanks for tuning in!  I haven't written in a while but I am still here!

I think about The Walk quite often.  The other day I went out after a dance to get a bite to eat and I met a couple of friends at the restaurant.  We sat around and they inquired about my adventure.  One friend asked me, "You must have had a lot of time to think.  What did you learn?"  When he asked me that, the following thought hit me.  I said, "You know, I did have lots of time to think.  But come to think of it, I didn't learn a darn thing from thinking a lot!"  I don't know about you, but I can spend a lot of time thinking about things.  I turn them all around in my mind, trying to understand and figure them out.  But in reality I never actually figure some things out no matter how long I spend thinking about them.  I'm talking about the things that just can't be figured out by our thinking.  I do get answers though, but I believe that the answers are in the form of wisdom, and are gifts from God.  I believe He gives me the answers when He sees that I am seriously seeking them.  I can't take any credit for any of the wisdom that I may possess.  There were things that I wrestled with all along the coast, and I did eventually get answers, but not from my own intelligence.

The Walk was marginally successful in terms of raising money for the Coder's children in Honduras.  I'm sure that it is not over yet- we will see.  However, before I left on this walk, I knew that it was much more than being all about raising money.  I knew that it was to help build my own faith and courage.  And that, it did!  My faith and courage are not complete, but they are vastly stronger than they were before The Walk.  The preparation for The Walk was a challenge in and of itself.  The Walk itself was actually easier by comparison. I struggled with fear and doubt while in preparation.  I didn't know if I was crazy or not, and I struggled with this.  I felt Him compelling me to keep on getting ready, and so, while wrestling with my fears and doubts, I continued my preparations.  I was apprehensive as I walked out my driveway.  It was probably two weeks before I started to feel my doubts subside.  I was not frightened for my own safety ever on The Walk.  But I was concerned with what I was doing- was it right?  You all might have seen that it was, but I personally struggled with it.  I can see that this was an issue that belonged to me, and so it was "mine."  Hence, The Walk.  He gave me what I needed to do to start to conquer my own fears and doubts.  See how that works? And amen, it did work!  But now I notice something.  As I have said before, faith and courage are like muscles- they need to be exercised to keep them in good shape.  As soon as I let up, they start to atrophy- I can feel it.  So what I learned from the preparation for The Walk, and from The Walk itself was this- do what is within my power to do, then start walking.  God takes care of the rest.  God can only steer a moving ship.  When I don't exercise my faith by stepping out I tie God's hands.  He can't provide if I don't give Him something to work with.  I find that a great challenge I face is to start to worry about obstacles that may be up ahead.  When I do that, I try to figure out how to deal with them from here, which is where I am right now.  The trouble is, I can only deal with an obstacle when I come up against it, which is then.  At that point God provides the way around if I trust Him.  Otherwise I would be carrying everything that I think I may need to get around that obstacle and pretty soon I am carrying so much stuff that I can't even walk!   So for me the answer is to keep moving and to trust that God is good................................the more I do this, the easier it gets.

So I hope that maybe you got something from my writing.  I try to say "I" instead of "us" or "we" in my writing now because the things I come up against are my own struggles and my own issues.  You have your own.  They may be similar, they may not be.  We love one another when we allow each other to learn his or her own lessons- our calling, I believe, is to love and encourage one another as we walk this journey together......

Love,
God bless,
Craig